Day 3 - Stepping Over the Line

Today I stepped over the line. After a fitful night, I woke up and decided that I am done with the way I have been doing things.

I stepped over the line and I am not going back. I am going to work my perception program. More about this change over the weekend.

Day 2 -

Day 2 - Paradigm Shit

If anyone out there is actually reading this - please hang in there - I promise that these posts will get funnier and less full of crazy-sounding content.  I am in a stream-of-consciousness phase at the moment.

Paradigm Shift - I hate that fucking word, but it is exactly what has to happen for this fucking thing to work. I need a paradigm shift.

My shift consists of getting all of the shit out of my head and moving it into my body.  I think too much and act to little and re-directing the energy into my body will make the action take place.

I am going to keep these posts short to keep up the momentum of posting.

Today is for getting out of my head and into my body

Today is for getting my work done - work that will bring in money

Today is for tightening the blinders and moving forward and not looking behind - looking to the past is my most toxic habit

Today is for connecting me to my spirit

Today is for learning to be okay alone

Today is for listing 3 things on ebay and 3 things on Craig's list

Today is for getting back out into the sunshine

Today is the day for my meditation practice, and taking some advice from one of my favorite books. It is a paradigm changer - even if I hate that fucking word.

  How can you make your today move you forward?

Day 1 - No Turning Back

Three years ago I stuffed my life into a steel drum, poured gas on it and lit the match. I incinerated my career, my hope, my character and my spirit. I have struggled to make my mess into what I refer to as a "real life", to no avail.

Today is the beginning of my year - well actually not a year - 10 months.  I am making the pledge to have my new life as ready to go as I can make it by my 55th birthday - 55 - I cannot believe I am looking at that number and it relates to me.

At the moment I am finishing four straight days of Downton Abbey with no shower. I had been doing well, but got stuck again. Always the stuck that fucks me up.

I have been on all different meds and tried all different paths. I am currently working with a life coach which has been a great decision for me. I practice mindfulness meditation, and when I practice I do well - when I don't I do not.

Life feels like a constant struggle right now - a line of constant horrible days where there are no bright spots and no light at the end of the tunnel.

So here is my account of how I change my life in 10 months.........